Depression Doesn't Define Me
Updated: Dec 29, 2022
In today's post I want to really shine a light on something that is very important to me. I have struggled with depression for years and it was always something that I was ashamed of. The stigma behind mental health illnesses is really unfounded in my opinion and it really shouldn't be that hard to find the help and support that you need. In this post I want to share a little bit of my story, this story will not be the same as someone else's. One thing I will say before I continue is to make sure that you are checking in on your friends and family. Mental Health Illnesses can be invisible and most people (like me) become really good at hiding that they are hurting to avoid making others hurt or feel bad for you. For this past year especially there have been many people who have experienced some of the depressive symptoms but regardless of if you have been diagnosed with depression or not, you are allowed to have bad days and you are allowed to say "I just feel down today". Ask for help. Talk to your friends. Talk to family. Find resources near you to help.
My Mental Health Journey
So my mental health journey began back in 2014 when I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder as well as major depressive disorder. Since then my depression has gotten better but my anxiety has stayed the same. Now I believe that my mental health issues started in 2010 when my opa, who I was extremely close to passed away suddenly. For me some little things I noticed within myself was that I withdrew from a lot of stuff I preferred to be alone, and I also noticed (as did my parents) that my emotions seemed to be all over the place. One second I would be happy and laughing and the next I could be crying and screaming or yelling and just angry. This all came to a head when I was finally diagnosed in July of 2014 and thus put onto medication. Over the years I have been on at least 5 different medications before finding the one that I am on now and this one really helps. I think the dosage may need to be upped soon but this medication is the best one I have been on.
My mental health now is finally in a place that I am very happy with. I finally feel like I have a grasp on my own life and now feel like I can finally be myself. Working for myself, on myself is something I have worked really hard for and it is something that even now some days I really struggle with but I am slowly getting better at it and I strive to better myself every day. I still take daily medication as well as other methods to help my mental health. This is not something that is simply going to go away and it is something that I will be struggling with for the rest of my life most likely but it is not something that I am going to be ashamed of or hide.
Something that I will always say because I know what it feels like to simply feel alone because no one seems to understand what is going on, is if you ever need someone to talk to be it simply to talk or to vent I am always a message away. Yes, the time difference can be hard but even if it is a bit later I will always message back.
There are tons of resources available for people to use online, be it therapy or simply support groups. Make sure to do your research and find a resource that works for you.